The Climb

4:11 AM Friday morning I lay in my bed asking Why? Why is she awake insisting on me getting out of bed and making her toast and turning the TV on. I turn over to Jeff and ask him why? He replies "just do it, it isn't worth the fight." I jump out of bed as usual and do the normal routine and I look at my calendar on the fridge and I see the date! It is exactly one year from today that I finally got an answer (not the answer that I may have wanted, but it was an answer)

Just a year ago Tyla was diagnoised with Autism. I remember driving home with my Mom from a 4 hour LONG appointment with my Mom and Tyla with my mind wandering 100 miles per hour. I immediately start making phone calls to several therapists who I have heard about. I joined a Mommy Group with Mom's who had children on the spectrum. My life had completely changed in a matter of a few hours and I have never been the same since!

Time to Time I ask "why me?" I compare Tyla to other 5 year olds and have some sort of jelousy that she isn't at the same level as they are. I feel sorry for myself and I cry. I feel that I should be doing more for her. Somedays I feel like I can't take it anymore and then I feel GUILTY. I feel guilty that I act like I am the only person who is dealing with everyday struggles, I feel guilty because there are families that have lost their child. I remember saying to my husband "Tyla is such a challenge" his reply was "Babe, she isn't a challenge she is an opportunity" these words have stuck with me and I am so thankful for Jeff and his love and support he has for Tyla. She is so blessed to have him in her life and so am I.

Friday was not a sad day for me it was a happy day. I looked back at all the goals I had set for Tyla and I was amazed at how much were already achieved within one year!I can't wait to see what this year holds for Tyla.

This song below (also playing) means so much to me because it is mine and Tyla's story. It is how I feel in my heart and I couldn't think of better words to describe our journey together. I love Tyla with all my heart and I am so blessed that my Heavenly Father chose me to be her Mommy, to take her hand and walk this journey with her.



I can almost see it
That dream I am dreaming
But there's a voice inside my head saying
"You'll never reach it"

Every step I'm taking
Every move I make feels
Lost with no direction
My faith is shaking

But I gotta keep trying
Gotta keep my head held high

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb

The struggles I'm facing
The chances I'm taking
Sometimes might knock me down
But no, I'm not breaking

I may not know it
But these are the moments that
I'm gonna remember most, yeah
Just gotta keep going

And I, I got to be strong
Just keep pushing on

'Cause there's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be a uphill battle
Sometimes I'm gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

There's always gonna be another mountain
I'm always gonna wanna make it move
Always gonna be an uphill battle
Somebody's gonna have to lose

Ain't about how fast I get there
Ain't about what's waiting on the other side
It's the climb, yeah!

Keep on moving, keep climbing
Keep the faith, baby
It's all about, it's all about the climb
Keep the faith, keep your faith